Fight for What You’re Worth: Why it HAS to Start With You

Know your worth, set your standards, and stop letting others define your value—real change starts when you believe you’re worth fighting for.

I’ve had the privilege of speaking to tens of thousands of people around the world every year—from corporate ballrooms to conference stages to social media feeds. And there’s a message I keep hearing (and seeing) that breaks my heart a little every time:

Too many people let other people determine their value. They wait for someone else to validate them. Approve them. Promote them. Pay them. Choose them.

Let’s change that—starting now.

Lesson Learned the Hard Way (So You Don’t Have To)

When I was first getting started in my speaking career, a woman called to book me for an event. She offered a low fee. I was excited. Eager. Desperate, honestly. So I said yes—too quickly. Not only did I accept the small fee without hesitation, but I sweetened the deal by offering to work all three days of her event and cover my own expenses.

I poured my heart into those three days. At the end of the event, she drove me to the airport and handed me the check. And then she said something I will never forget:

“Let me tell you something, Connie. I would have paid you ten times this amount. But I’m not going to feel guilty—because this is what you asked for. If you go through life not knowing your worth, don’t blame others for taking advantage. I didn’t take advantage of you. I gave you what you said you were worth.”

Ouch. But wow.

That moment changed everything.

If You Don’t Know Your Worth, No One Else Can Either

Here’s the truth: how others treat us is often a reflection of how we treat ourselves. If you don’t recognize your own value, how can anyone else?

Whether it’s in your career, your relationships, or your daily decisions, you teach people how to treat you by what you accept, tolerate, and settle for.

5 Actionable Steps to Start Fighting for What You’re Worth

Let’s stop leaving your value in someone else’s hands. Here’s where to begin:

1. Audit Your Inner Dialogue

Would you talk to a friend the way you talk to yourself? If not, it’s time for a rewrite.
Action: Write down 3 things you say to yourself when you mess up—and rewrite each one into something supportive and growth-minded.

2. Set Boundaries That Honor Your Value

You are not available 24/7. You are not a doormat. You are not “less than.”
Action: Choose one area of your life where your time or energy is being drained unfairly and set a boundary. Communicate it. Hold it.

3. Know Your Non-Negotiables

Confidence doesn’t come from arrogance—it comes from clarity.
Action: Write a short list of non-negotiables for your work, relationships, and life. What will you not settle for anymore?

4. Celebrate Your Wins (Big and Small)

If you’re always moving the finish line, you’ll never feel enough.
Action: At the end of each day, write down one thing you did well. Make it a ritual. Build your confidence like a muscle.

5. Ask for What You’re Worth—Out Loud

Silence doesn’t serve your success. Ask for the promotion. Negotiate the rate. Speak up in the meeting.
Action: Practice saying, “Here’s what I charge,” or “I’d like to be considered for…” with a friend until it feels natural.

Let This Be Your Wake-Up Call

You are not here to be background noise in someone else’s story.

You are not meant to shrink, bend, or wait quietly for someone to notice your brilliance.

You are uniquely valuable, wildly capable, and absolutely worth advocating for. So please—start treating yourself that way.

Because once you do, the world will follow your lead.

Want to empower your team or audience to own their value, speak with confidence, and lead with strength?
Let’s talk about bringing this message—and more—to your next event.

If your team, audience, or organization is ready to break through self-doubt, silence the inner critic, and step into their true power—this is the message they need to hear. Because knowing your worth isn’t just about self-esteem—it’s the foundation for stronger leadership, healthier relationships, better business decisions, and bolder action.

As a speaker, I don’t just deliver motivation—I spark transformation. I challenge the status quo, dismantle the limiting beliefs that keep people stuck, and create space for real conversations that drive real growth.

Let’s help your people stop waiting to be chosen—and start choosing themselves.

👉 Book me to speak at your next event and let’s ignite a room full of people who are ready to fight for what they’re worth—and win.