Stop Assuming and Start Listening: The Modern Salesperson’s Guide to Closing More Deals
You’ve heard the old saying about making assumptions, right? Let’s just say it doesn’t work out well for the person making them. In today’s fast-paced, diverse world, assuming you know everything—how to read the room, the person, or the buyer—is not just outdated; it’s sabotaging your success.
Here’s a true story to drive the point home.
I once went car shopping and brought my husband along. I knew exactly what I wanted and was focused on vehicles with features that mattered most to me. Then, along comes the salesperson. Instead of acknowledging me, the actual buyer, he made a beeline for my husband. With a firm handshake and direct eye contact, he asked, “So, what’s it going to take to get YOU into this car today?”
My husband smiled knowingly, pointed at me, and said, “This car is for her, and I’m not sure there’s ANYTHING you could do now to get HER into a car.”
Ouch.
To his credit, the salesperson realized his error and scrambled to salvage the situation. But the damage had been done, and it was entirely avoidable.
The High Cost of Assumptions
Assumptions in sales don’t just cost credibility—they cost deals. Whether you’re selling cars, real estate, or complex B2B solutions, outdated habits like relying on stereotypes, ignoring key decision-makers, or projecting your own ideas onto buyers can derail a sale before it even starts.
In my book, How to Make a Fortune Selling to Women, I outline strategies to help salespeople unlearn old mindsets and embrace more effective methods for selling in today’s world. (Fun fact: The flip side of the book is How to Make a Fortune Selling to Men—and it’s shorter because, generally, men tend to approach the buying process more directly.)
Why It’s Time to Rethink Your Sales Strategy
Here’s the thing: women now control a staggering share of purchasing power. They’re investors, executives, pilots, entrepreneurs, and decision-makers in nearly every industry. And the truth is, everyone—regardless of gender—expects a sales experience that prioritizes their needs, respects their intelligence, and delivers real solutions.
But here’s the catch: you won’t know what they need unless you ask.
Strategies for Modern Selling Success
- Listen More Than You Talk
Buyers will tell you everything you need to know if you give them the chance. Start by asking open-ended questions like, “What’s most important to you about this purchase?” Then, really listen. Take notes. Reflect their answers back to show you’re paying attention. - Stop Selling Based on Appearances
Never assume someone’s buying power, preferences, or decision-making authority based on their gender, attire, or age. Selling based on assumptions not only alienates buyers but also limits your opportunities. - Learn the Art of Asking the Right Questions
Great salespeople are great detectives. Instead of guessing what your buyer wants, ask clarifying questions like:- “What problem are you hoping to solve?”
- “What features matter most to you?”
- “What’s your timeline for making a decision?”
- Adapt Your Approach for Different Buyers
Tailor your sales process to match the personality and preferences of the buyer. Some people appreciate data and details, while others prefer a quick, big-picture overview. Understanding these nuances can mean the difference between closing a deal and losing one. - Empathize, Don’t Assume
Empathy is one of the most underutilized tools in sales. Try to see the purchase from your buyer’s perspective. What challenges are they facing? How can your product or service make their life easier or better? - Earn Respect, Not Just a Sale
When buyers feel respected and understood, they’re more likely to trust you—and trust leads to referrals, repeat business, and long-term success.
Bottom Line: The Listening Edge
Sales isn’t about pitching; it’s about connecting. When you stop assuming and start truly listening, you not only sell more—you build lasting relationships that pay dividends far beyond the initial transaction.
In the words of Maya Angelou, “People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Make your buyers feel heard, respected, and empowered, and the sales will take care of themselves.
Bottom line? Quit assuming and start REALLY listening. People will tell you everything you need to know if you give them the chance.
To learn more about this topic, check out my short video above, Quit Making Assumptions, which is part of my series called Top 10 Things You Need to Quit to Be a Better Salesperson. Click here to check out my YouTube channel.
If you’re ready to take your team’s communication and sales skills to the next level, let’s make it happen! I’ll help your team ditch outdated tactics, master the art of listening, and connect authentically with today’s buyers. Together, we’ll turn assumptions into understanding—and boost your sales like never before. Let’s get started! Reach out today to bring me in for your next training or event.
